Friday, November 19, 2010
Seeing Double? Twins!
Hey everyone, I just thought of an interesting topic to discuss! Twins. In my family, twins are prevalent on both sides. My dad has twin sisters, and my grandmother (my mom's mother) is a twin. Therefore it is a possibility that either my sister or I might have twins. I always ponder the concept of twins when I think about having children someday. What kind of impact do you think twins has on a family rather than just two siblings? Does sibling rivalry increase with twins rather than just siblings? Does it seem to you that twins either love being a twin or hate it? What differs in relationships between identical or fraternal twins? Finally, how is the twin relationship different if the twins are both the same gender or of two different genders? I know this is a lot of questions, just looking for some interesting feedback! :)
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One of my best friends is a twin and she loves it! She used to absolutely hate it because people were always confusing her name with her sister's and they used to be one unit rather than two people, but now she can't go a week without talking about how much she misses her sister and it's rare that 2 days go by where she doesn't say her sister's name.
I always wished I had a twin, just for someone to play with and be able to more fully understand the things that happen to me, but my parents always said that one of me is way more than enough. I still don't agree with that, but I see their point.
I don't think that having twins is a genetic trait, rather, extreme fertility is probably what's going on. In a family with twins, it's probable that there are other siblings to compete with as well. Me and my sister are extremely competitive, but that's because she thinks that, because she's older, she ought to be better. With twins, it might be a more level playing field, or they just split and go completely opposite directions with their energies.
Nice topic
This is such an interesting post! I wonder what it would be like to have a twin sometimes especially an identical twin! I can't imagine having someone walking around that looked exactly like me; however, I do believe that both fraternal and identical twins share a bond unmatched by simply having a sibling.
I mean, you pretty much have a companion since birth! They're the same age so they're going to experience the same things around the same time especially if the twins are the same gender. I also think fraternal twins have more of a chance of being individuals rather than identical twins. I'm sure I would be annoyed if people constantly mixed me up with my sister.I think that twins can be a challenge for a family. Instead of taking care of one baby, you have two, and I'm sure raising them is just as difficult. I hate seeing people dress their children in matching outfits! I don't think it helps with the whole personal identity problem!
I not sure if anyone has heard of this, but there is a documentary on National Geographic about an area in Brazil with a population that 47% is comprised of identical twins.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ItHrNPxRY-A
Just thought it was interesting! :)
Carolyn, that video about the area in Brazil is crazy!!!!
Anyway, I always wanted to be a twin just so that I would have an automatic best friend. You'd share everything with your twin, and sure you'd compete to each find your own identity, but every set of twins that I know (whether fraternal or identical, absolutely love each other).
On the overall family, twins would be more difficult to care for I guess since I've heard that taking care of one baby is enough work in itself.
I also think that the relationships between fraternal and identical twins wouldn't be too different - identical twins might be closer because they are the same sex and it's usually easier to relate to girls if you're a girl and guys if you're a guy but there would also be the additional stress of competing against your identical twin more so than you would if you were a fraternal twin.
The impact of having twins in a family would obviously be double. Two going to school at the same time, with double the fun, but with also double the expenses. Two going to college at the same time, let's hope they can get scholarships. If they were just siblings of different ages, the expenses would pan out differently.
I don't think rivalry increases with twins, I actually think they would ban together, than split apart. I grew up with a twins next door to me; we played together all the time and they seem to like being twins. Yes, they didn't like it when people switched them up, but I think that can go both ways. They probably had fun confusing people sometimes.
I also agree with Carolyn, that fraternal twins have a better chance at being individuals than identical twins do. There were fraternal twins in the mid-school I went to and I didn't even know they were related for the longest time.
If twins are the same gender, obviously they can share a lot more as they grow older and into puberty, but that doesn't mean they can't have an equally deep emotional connection. I know a girl who has a twin brother and as far as I know they are pretty close, but their relationship is definitely not the same as the twins girls who grew up next to me.
And just for the record, like all of you, I always wanted a twin, because like you all said, it would be an instant built in best friend, someone you can always share everything with because they are pretty much obligated to stick by you forever, especially if they share your face. The only thing I think would be a downfall is that because you share the same look, you have to try that much harder to make yourself known as an individual, not always known as AshleyandRebecca (the girls next door), but overall I think it is a pretty sweet deal :).
Oh, I feel so bad for parents that have twins sometimes. Of course it's great to have two healthy kids, but I can't imagine the work it would take to have two babies at once. However, I've always thought that it would be cool to have twins as well as to be a twin.
Like everyone else has said, a twin is a natural best friend. They would be there to listen and share childhood. Constant companionship was one part of my childhood that I am so thankful for. It seems like most twins I see are always together and almost coexist in a way.
Another cool thing everyone may not know is that there is a type of identical twins that are called mirror twins. Mirror twins are exact opposites-from dominant hands to birth marks. Their organs can even be on opposite sides of the body! Check out the link for more info.
http://www.twinstuff.com/index.php/twin-facts/137-mirror-image-twins
I always wanted to be an identical twin! I probably always wanted to be a twin in part due to my mild obsession with the Olsen twins when I was little haha. I actually have a strange story about twins, kind of. In Boston when I was in a sorority and I got my "Little" (it's similar to a mentoring program in which the older brother or sister is supposed to be a role model for the little sister), I found out that due to a particular set of circumstances I was going to have 'Twins', or two little sisters. At first I was completely excited, but when it came time to get them presents or when I would hang out with them, it was so difficult to make sure I was giving them an equal amount of attention!! I mean the two girls themselves weren't particularly close but I adored both of them which made the situation even more uncomfortable on occasion! What I mean is that, I would be sitting there with the two of them and would try to talk to one of them about how things were going, and at the same time I would feel horribly guilty that the other girl was left out! Also I would have to buy presents for them for initiation, and I wanted to get them both things that they would like, and yet I wanted to make sure that neither of them felt like the other one was getting the better gift. It was way harder than I thought it would be! From that experience I decided that I would not like to have twins, but if I do, I will absolutely be that tacky woman who makes her identical twins color coordinate haha :)
Well, I just can't seem to get this comment right :P...Anyway...
I've read a book about mirror twins Leah! Granted it's a pretty intensely messed up family story, something perfect for this class :P. If you ever want to read it, it's by the same person who wrote The Time Traveler's Wife, Audrey Niffennegger and it's called Her Fearful Symmetry. I actually brought it up as an option for our group to do, but we ended up with My Sister's Keeper instead.
And Tara, I completely agree, if I have twins I will definitely be that mom who dresses the same, at least for the first few years of their life.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts guys! I just think it is interesting that most of you think twins do not really encounter much rivalry, and more of a strong bond. I personally think such a situation would foster a lot of competition as the twins grow up. But I suppose perhaps that preventing such competition may be a job for the parents. If the parents encouraged them to get involved in separate activities, this situation could be resolved. However, I do agree with most of you that being a twin could be one of the greatest friendships imaginable. In talking about twins, it was funny to see my twin aunts this Thanksgiving. They used to look so much alike when I was younger but now they have a little bit different appearances. I have heard so many stories about how they were so close when they were younger, and even just seeing them at Thanksgiving, it was cool to see how close they still are :) Thanks again for the great comments!
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